It is hard to explain to a loving person who can only give, what the refusal to receive does to would-be givers. If our gifts come out of the substance of who we are, to refuse our gifts is a rejection of our very self. At the same time, the turning away of a gift destroys the reciprocity of love. In place of mutuality, it sets up a hierarchy of love that makes the one who always receives and whose gifts are refused feel empty, powerless, and incompetent to love well, and so unable in turn to receive from the beloved with a grateful heart.
Whether you know it or not, you were
born to have a rendezvous with destiny;
your journey toward it has already
begun. But my people make a distinction between destiny and fate. We don't think we are
born with a "fate" that impels us to act out some script composed by a higher hand, but
rather that each of us has a destiny, a preexisting pattern, which, in our hearts, we wish one
day to fulfill.